HRM-11

  story

                                                    FLOWER IN THE DESSERT

This happened in many many summers ago...


There was a young flower in the desert where all was dry and sad looking.... It was growing by itself...enjoying everyday... and saying to the sun " When shall i grown up"? and the sun would say " Be patient"---Each time I touch you, you grow a little".. and she was so pleased. Because each would have a chance to bring beauty to this corner of sand...And this is all she wanted to do ...bring a little bit of beauty to this world...
One day the hunter came by---and stepped on her.--She was going to die---and she felt so sad.. Not because she was dying--but because she would not have a chance to bring a little bit of beauty to this corner of the desert.
The great spirit saw her, and was listening.--Indeed, he said...she should be living... And he reached down and touched her---and gave her life. And she grew up to be a bneautiful flower...and this corner of the desert became so beautiful beacuse of her.

                                                                                                                                                 sir denz:-]


People succeed in life becausethey are convinced they can. They believe in themselvesn in their abilities and potentials and at the same time they honestly recognize their weaknesses or limitations As the saying goes:

           " What we think, we feel, what we feel, we act"

Self -image - is powerful force that influences people's minds, feelings and behavior,,inclined to vibrate negative emotions and unpleasant behavior, affecting others in detremental ways, making him vulnerable to failure in his personal life or career.
Self-esteem - is the opinion you have or yourself and value as a person,,and self confidence is also a factor..

Self-confidence - relates to self assuredeness in one's personality, judegement, ability and powers.


The Indicators of Positive self-image:

1. realistic view of one self
2. being true to oneself and accepting oneself in temrs of a wholeness self-esteem.
3. positive affirmation
4. warm and happy countenance
5. being at peace with oneself
6. belief in oneself
7. will and determination to get what one wants

The Indicators or Negative self-image:

Physical signs

tense and anxious
gloomy and unhappy countenance
hesitance to give an eye contact
keeping physical distance
weak and wilted handshake
sloppy and shabby appearance
weak, too soft and uncertain voice.


Psychological signs

psychosomatic tendencies
timidity and shyness
tendency to withdraw or isolate himself
always seeking attention
being too pleasingin an attemp to gain acceptance
monopolizing a conversation,being compulsive tlker
compulsive smoking or drinking,resorting to scapegoat
impatience and irritability
tendency to be judgemental or insulting
indulgence in gossip or hearsays
always complaining
refusal to admit mistakes
all knowing attitude, pretending to know alot of things
tendency to inhibit or dominate others
jealousy and envy
suspiciousness or paranoid behavior
remorse or guilt, feeling ashamed
tendency to compare oneself with others
idol worship-idolizing msports heroes,movie star, etc.
dislike to oneself
resorting to various forms of defense mechanism like ratinalization etc.

THE DEVELOPMENT OF SELF IMAGE AND SELF ESTEEM

 The develpment of self image is influence by the impressions that a person gets from his significant others- meaning the persons significant to him like his parents, peers, teachers, friends, etc according to james cooler calls this the " looking glass self " The impact of significant others is very strong during the formative years       (1-6 years old). Thsts why according to the father of psychology Sigmund Freud contended that the foundation of the self and the ego is the first 6 years of life.


The 3 Interaction Forces
id
ego
superego


The 5 A's for Healthy Development

Acceptance-the experience of being unconditionally loved, being accepted for what you are, without conditions, being athome with others
Appreciation- the experience of being valued, givenm importance of having someone delight in oneself.
Approval- being recognize and acknowledge for one's success or achivements.
Affirmation- being valued for one's individuality or uniqueness and giftedness.
Affection- being touched caringly and storked lovingly and embraced tenderly because one is worthy of beingloved and cherished.